Thursday, December 31, 2009

Heartless Comments of 2009!

Getting it out of my system here in 2009 so 2010 is nothing but 'positive vibes'!

BTW- this also serves as a fair warning to all you stupid people out there who have EVER said any one or combination of these lines to an infertile!!!! Just saying... Your warning has been served. :-)

"Just adopt. We would love the baby the same but maybe then you would be relaxed enough to get pregnant naturally."

"You're too fat to get pregnant."

"God won't bless you until you learn what He is trying to tell you."

"Maybe you aren't meant to have children?"

"Take mine for a day. You'll change your mind."

"If you can't afford IVF, how are you going to afford a child?"

"I wish you could take some of my excessive fertility for yourself."

"You have nieces/newphews right? Don't they count?"

"You're so young still. Why stress yourself out?"

"Why have kids as they only cost money and cause stress?"

"Do you really want sleepless nights, your house smelling like poppy diapers, extra laundry to do, and the hassle of going anywhere?"

"Just Relax..."

It upsets me just writing these! Stupid people!!!!! This is not even close to all of the 2009 collection of heartless comments made but you get the idea.

I want sleepless nights. I want my house smelling like poopy diapers. I want to carry a diaper bag along with my purse and toys everywhere I go. I want my car to be trashed with baby items. I want the added expense of kids. I want to be a young mom. I WANT TO BE A MOMMY DAG GUM IT!!!

Being a mommy also brings the heart melting when your child gives you that first smile. The first belly laugh. When he/she says 'mama' for the first time. When they raise their arms for you to pick up and snuggle knowing your love and touch takes away all their pain and frustration. They mimic you. To see them learn new things because you taught it to them. The first steps, to you, as they simply want to be with you. And so much more!

I want this more than my heart can even bare. I want to have the same feeling my mom has for me {and my brothers} that no matter what we say or do to upset her, she'll always love us. That mother/child bond. I want to see Charles look at his son/daughter for the first time just as I have seen of the captured moments from friend's with the new dad's looking at their children in utter amazement and awe.

Wanting all this so much my heart hurts and then having someone stupid make any of the previous statements, or many more not mentioned, just sets me on fire. Why do people feel it necessary??? To think it necessary that since I have never been a mom I can't possibly have that longing feeling so desiring to be a mom and yet they can as they know what it's like to have a child call out to you to comfort them when sick or hurting.

Let's get all of these heartless comments we've had made to/at us out of our system so that we can go into 2010 with only positive and encouraging thoughts!!!

Here's to 2010 full of babies {please us too!!!!} and dreams coming true!!!


TwoDogMama said...

I agree 100% Meaghan! 2010 will be a positive year full of babies! Good riddance 2009 and welcome 2010!

squirrelgirl said...

Oh, yeah - there are some winners out there. Since we have Katherine, people assume we can just pop another one out anytime we want to. Lately I've been getting the snarky comments again. Some of my favorites:
"You owe Katherine a sibling."
"It's mean to have an only child".
"What are you waiting for? You're not getting any younger."
"Have you forgotten how it works?"

Seriously, folks - why is it any of your business how many kids I have? They really just have no clue how hurtful it is to hear that nonsense. Be gone, haters!

Anonymous said...

meaghan, today is my first day reading your blog and i am becoming a fan and am here for support and to be your cheerleader. i hope and pray this new year brings u the pregnancy u so deserve. ~layla~

mom said...

Not to excuse the thoughtless comments, but I truly think people just don't know what to say, so they think they are "encouraging" the infertile by making the thoughtless comments. I can't even imagine not having children! It hurts my heart more than I can bear to watch you suffer so. (and because of your involement in trying to help others, I now hurt for them too) Start 2010 knowing that God has amazing plans for your suffering and He will bless you with your very own bundle of joy! I pray this is the year that the stork gets unlost and finds his way to your home.