Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Age differences or just Child differences?

This post is probably going to be all over the place. Sorry. So many thoughts going in different directions and I'm not too good at organizing my thoughts...

The older I get {yes, I realize I'm only 25 but each year that passes by seems to quadruple my age, or so it feels!} the less I feel like an equal to my peers. We find it sometimes difficult to 'fit in' with others our age.

Us? No child.

Them? {Usually} 1-3...

No fear. Let me explain... :-)

Society expects us to have {at least one child anyhow} children by now. After all, we've been married for six years. That's the natural course, right??

We thought so.

God didn't think so.

Hence, 3 years, 11 months, and 7 days since we decided to expand our family, still childless.

I hate when people ask how old I am or how long we've been married. I know the exact question to follow, "So. When are you going to have children?" "Haven't you been married long enough?" "You're in your prime." UGH!

I feel like a majority of my 'equals' are mommies. Conversations become so different. Priorities, so different. It helps, some, that I can contribute to conversations and such thanks to all my experience with children, but it's not the same. It helps {in my mind anyways} that we are not parting people. We enjoy a good night in with good company, good conversation, and good games. We can certainly, and are, friends with couples who have children. We're not that infertile couple that cannot have anything to do with children until we have one.

So what makes the most difference, do you think??

Age or lack of child?


Stephanie said...

Lack of child. I totally noticed it when we were childless and everyone else around us had kids. But you are only 25, you should be able to find plenty of people without kids. We didn't have kids until I was 30.

Nicole said...

lack of child. Harsh, but true.
However... you should try this sometime: The next time someone asks you the usual questions (how old, when married, when kids...), obvioulsy it's not going to be a friend or they would already know these things. It makes me upset when total strangers pry into my personal life on a sore subject like that. A few years ago I started replying to the "kids" question with, "Actually we're completely infertile." This is ALMOST always followed by an "open-mouth-insert-foot-I'm-such-a-jerk expression, which is priceless. And then they leave it alone :) I don't think it's rude anymore, and it's SOOO liberating!! lol