Friday, April 25, 2008

What an EMOTIONAL day!!!!!!!!!!!

Today has just been another one of THOSE days. I have been SO emotional about everything. I am certainly blaming it on some fast acting Provera I took last night, that's for sure! LOL I have been trying to convince Charles and myself to take at least a six month break from trying to have a baby. He's been saying no. I've been saying yes. It's been back and forth, back and forth. Just the whole possibilty of moving and new jobs and selling our house and my classes and jobs and just life... Well after spending like ALL day talking about this I decided myself that I was taking at least a six month break. Trying to convince myself that this will be best as certainly by then I'll be at my goal weight/size.

So, tonight I even posted on the trying to concieve forum to the AMAZING gals (my support system) that I was not trying anymore and would not be on as often... I had posted to the three threads I'm apart of and when I just happened to check out the "weight loss and TTC" section there was a rather new reply to a topic I posted on those that had tried the South Beach Diet, especially PCOS'ers, and their success. This response was posted April 13, 2008 from someone I do not know. Yeah, she's even from GEORGIA and this is a WORLD WIDE forum... how likely is THAT??

"I just bought the south beach diet book. I will just type word for word a very interesting part! "Many of the dieters who came to us through the TV news coverage have been in their twenties and thirties. One young woman, 30 lbs overweight, had been trying to conceive for 7 years. She tried the diet, lost the weight in just a few months, and then discovered she was pregnant. Though we were willing to take credit for this pleasant turn of events, it wasn't until about a year later that I discovered why the diet had allowed her to conceive. There is a condition called polycystic ovary syndrome that is a common cause of abnormal periods and infertility in young women. It turns out that it is due to insulin resistence or prediabetes. By reversing this syndrome with the diet, her periods normalized and a successful pregnancy followed." I have never been diagnosed with pcos but something is definitely wrong or not working right. I thought this was interesting and it brought tears to my eyes!!"

I just started crying... This, I feel, is my promise God has made me. I WILL one day have a baby. All in HIS timing. I just feel like God is telling me NOT to give up. I also feel so very reassured that I am headed down the right path by going and staying on the South Beach diet. I ALSO have just under 30 pounds left to my goal weight (same as the gal in the story!)... This TOO was exactly what I needed to hear after this emotional rollar coaster of a ride day I have had!!!!

Gosh, I serve an AWESOME and AMAZING GOD!!!!!!!!!! A God who cares SO MUCH about ME to put into place both yesterday's Angel and today's Angel that posted 11 days ago... That they all happened at exactly the right time, in the right order, and in a manner that I could hear Him. How can I not trust someone who does all this just for me?? Not to mention the orchastration that He did several years ago in the introduction of the lady who reconnected with me for no reason who pointed me in the direction of this new Dr. Wow. My head is spinning just trying to place all these puzzle pieces together!!!! I'll stop and just trust. As hard as that is sometimes...

Off to take another pill to make me more hormonal!!!


Annie Kates said...

What a wonderful sign from God in that post. You have been having them a lot lately, so He must be hearing you. The Lord does have a plan for us. Someday we will be mothers.

squirrelgirl said...

Congrats on your test results! And how wonderful that you are getting the guidance you have been seeking on the TTC front :-) Thanks for checking in on me and Miss K, we'll be visiting you here now. Keep up the good work on the SBD; I've heard some great things about it if you follow it correctly.

Ray and Chrissy said...

Provera stinks. From experience it's the worst. Hopefully this will be your last time taking it. Good luck!